I like my Mac because it’s slim and smart like me minus the slim part, and I mean smart is subjective, but you get the idea. The keyboard glows, as does the Apple with a bite out of it on the cover, so that makes me think I’m modern and understand things.

I like my Adidas high-tops because I’ve convinced myself they convey a carefree, cool nonchalance. Although I just Swiffered the floor in our house because our carpet is getting cleaned and Fall is a dirty season, as evidenced by said floor. This seems decidedly un-nonchalant, but I still wear the shoes.

I don’t like the internet because I get lost in it. Also, it captures too much attention. I think it’s creepy. I try and balance this with the realization my father probably said the same thing about television. I remember him yelling at me for watching “Married, with Children.” Although he didn’t really yell at me, he just said “…change it, CHANGE IT, CHANGEIT!” until I changed it. It really bugged him.

I don’t like writing difficult things – like an ad campaign I’m working on with the goal of getting people to give up on Search Engine Optimization. People being companies. I find it difficult mostly because I don’t fully understand why one should give up on Search Engine Optimization – other than I have this instinct that it’s a huge distraction and fairly pointless in the big picture. Big picture being what the idea you’re trying to get out into the world is all about.

Plus, in a city full of tech companies such a campaign is the equivalent of giving people the middle finger. But maybe that’s part of why I’m doing it. I’m not that nice, it possibly turns out.

I don’t like lacking a professional purpose, which is currently my state of being. Again, I don’t like this because it’s difficult. I essentially create projects of my own to find purpose, so it feels like floundering in mud – heavy, dirty, annoying and ridiculous. One time while duck hunting, I got stuck in the mud. It must have been quite a sight, me literally rolling around in mud in the dark, swearing, sweating and for a brief moment wondering if I would escape the earth’s clutches.

It was more of a flopping than a rolling, now that I think about it.

I do like helping people though. That’s a purpose. I’m as capitalist as the next person but money isn’t the driver. The driver is figuring out how to connect and give people respite from whatever ails them.

Maybe what I don’t like is not knowing how to help people and make a living out of it – likely because it’s difficult. I can work on that.