Share Post:

Share on facebook
Share on linkedin
Share on twitter
Share on pinterest
Share on email



It’s pouring down rain here and 46-degrees and horrible out. And windy. Plus there’s a tech bubble. Great combination.


I’m not sure what a tech bubble is. Really it’s a rich person bubble. Or a perfectly-willing-to-spend-$15-on-a-craft-cocktail bubble. Or a make-my-house-more-valuable-but-also-a-larger house-unattainable bubble


Most of my neighbors work in the tech industry. I’m not sure exactly what they do. I’m not sure they know exactly what they do.


In general their work appears to involve computer code and anything “digital.”


Wait, doesn’t digital just mean it’s on a screen? Like a “digital advertising campaign” is just an advertising campaign that the recipient experiences on their phone or laptop? If this is the case is it really worth calling out the “digital” part? Or is all of this secretly disarmingly complex, like a radio ad, which is its own genre of advertising that’s quite technical at execution and hosts content very specifically constructed to the medium?


Oh I don’t know.


I just know pop-up ads can’t possibly work. Especially on a phone.


They seem really smart. My tech neighbors. And really relaxed. I bet their work is stressful, but their bi-monthly direct deposit number must be substantial enough to explain why when I see them in the wild (73rd Street) they’re just kind of leaning back and not making eye contact with a slightly stupefied smile on their face and dollar signs in their eyes. As in while they’re (bored) talking to me and responding to my pestering questions they spontaneously think about buying a 2021 Mercedes Benz E-Class wagon on a lark then realize they could, in that very moment, drive to the dealership and actually do it. With cash.


Or maybe they’re stoned. It’s hard to tell. Either way they’re a tight-lipped (albeit relaxed) bunch.


I know a guy who works for Google. He went to MIT. Not long after he started I ran into him and asked how it was going. He said “Pretty good. Today I took a nap.” I haven’t napped on-the-job since high school when I worked for the Park District and me and this guy figured out we could put the wheelbarrows under the apple tree and sleep in them until lunch.


Full of leaves of course. Empty wheelbarrows are uncomfortable.


The next time I see my Mercedes-driving stoned tech neighbors I’ll try and pull some actual job details out of them and let you know what this is all about. I can’t tell if they’re smug or I’m jealous or if they just assume all 742,000 residents within The City Limits work in the technology field so it’s a non-starter but it’s like pulling freakin’ teeth to get them to fess up. It’s as if despite being given ample opportunity they don’t want to talk about themselves. How crazy is that?


I know this – I’m really good at not understanding things, and I want answers.

More Updates

Beware of Physics and Esprit de Corps

The original conversation went something like this: Lieutenant: “He said he never makes mistakes, they’re just misunderstandings.” Chief: “What were you doing in the sewage

Subscribe to our newsletter or we'll totally freak out.

Engaging irreverence, occasional coherence, often pointed, mixed with enough indelicate humor as to create a want, a craving for more.